The Unmistakable Cone of Ignorance

I’ve always like tats. Well not always but certainly since I was 12 or so. I don’t have any though. Mainly this lack of ink stems from two sources. One… My mom hates them and since she was paying for college and life in general it seemed rude to get them on her dime … and Two… I just never seemed to think up a design that could stick with me for a year in the ol’ one year hopper. I’ve got 3 designs in mind now that are in waiting queue.

1) a semi futuristic warhammer with cabling and power cords and runes for death and thunder/lightning(not sure what culture of runes yet) with the words ‘Break a bone for me’ outside and around the handle.

2) either a red circle with a line through the world religion inside the circle(like a no smoking sign) and the words ‘No Gods, No Masters’ on the outside of the circle or just the phrase itself. Can’t decide yet.

3) A coat of arms style tat with crossed battle axes and a large pissed off anthropomorphic badger with oversized claws and a red mohawk. Possibly an ascot and a pipe or cigar could be thrown in.

All this depends on how I feel in a year and if I can find an artist I trust/like to do it. I also need to draw all the designs and make sure I’m not allergic to the inks. Really though I just love tats and I’d love to get some. There was a professor at rose that had KMFDM album covers tattoo’d on his biceps. They were really well done too. I never had him for a class but he was pretty awesome I’d heard and I talked to him occasionally.
As much as I love tats though I’m not a fan of ‘flash’ or mindless tats. Tats can be meaningful or they can be artistic or they can be both but they should be individual in my mind. If they’re a group thing then they definitely need to be meaningful.

On a side note: I wish I had more cause to wear suits just so I could justify buying a nice selection of suits. Sigh one will have to do.

So in the spirit of all things awesome, I give you my new religion that I just now made up while sitting on the couch reading a novel and wearing my Sisters of Mercy hoodie. It is the religion of the great and mighty Great Badger. He commands me to grow my hair long and wear it in a militaristic fashion with mouse skulls braided into it. He commands that I grow my chin goatee long and braided as well. He is the source of all things feral and all things great. All hail the Great Badger!

Back to my corner… where I shall await more commandments from the Great Badger to be related at a later date.

Do you ever have a burning sensation when you pee? It could be that you have bladder badgers and they are clawing their way down your urethra. Another sign of bladder badgers is general pain in the bladder. That pain results when the bladder badgers have a bladder badger battle in your bladder. Nothing can incapacitate you as a fast as an out of control bladder badger battle between many bladder badgers in your bladder. now say it 5 times fast. BLADDER BADGER BATTLE!